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- It takes 10 minutes scrolling down to your age when you register online.
- Your buddies see you shirtless and opine that you are “cut”, when it’s more like “creased.”
- You can’t have a beer less than two days before a race.
- Corner girls yell “Woo hoo! Go old guys!”
- There is more hair in your ears than on your head.
- When you stand around, wrinkles cover your kneecaps.
- You gave your Garmin to your wife ’cause you’d like to put a nail through it.
- You can’t leave your home county without stopping for a bathroom visit.
- Revealing your age is a strategy – as in, I’m not in your race, we’re in separate categories.
- Cunning is more valuable than cardio.
- Flats absolutely require bifocals.