Amusement: I don’t like riding Dirt and Gravel roads because…

I don’t like riding dirt and gravel roads because…

  • That gravel ride is four hours too long.
  • I don’t like riding on bumpy roads.
  • I don’t like the route, it has too many turns on it. I prefer riding straight roads.
  • I only ride my cyclocross bike during cyclocross season. I could ruin my entire season if I ride more than two hours.
  • You guys ride too hard on Tuesday nights during cyclocross season. I don’t want to ruin my Sunday race.
  • I own a cyclocross bike, but I only commute on it. Removing the rack is too much work.
  • My coach said I cannot ride in zone three or higher at any time this week.
  • I don’t own a cyclocross bike, but the local shop has one in my size. I could borrow it, but that’s too much work.
  • I don’t want to buy special “gravel tires” for my bike.
  • But how will I suck wheel with dirt in my face?
  • Your routes have too many dogs along them.
  • I don’t like getting my bike or tires (tyres) dirty.
  • My mountain bike is a 29’er. I could totally ride gravel if I had a 27.5’er and full suspension.
  • Gravel cycling is road cycling for mountain bikers – therefore, I am too cool to do it.
  • I don’t own a jersey crappy enough to ride gravel with.
  • I’d join you guys but my cyclocross bike has no bottle cages and I don’t like Camelbaks.
  • I’ll drive four hours for a 45 minute race, but not 45 minutes for a four hour race.
IDon'tRideGravel-2015-1
Bugger. I am so going to get dirty.

8 Comments

  1. Avatar Al Arauz

    There better not be any mud!

  2. Avatar Eric Martin

    “Gravel riding hurts my soul”

    • JOM JOM

      Haha awesome.

      And another along a similar vein. Gravel riding hurts my arse.

  3. Avatar Shanno Wyatt

    long gravel rides make me cry to Alan Jacksons music. True story.

  4. Avatar David Jordan

    For me dogs are the worst part of riding dirt roads. Too many maladjusted pit bulls wanting a taste of my flesh.

    • JOM JOM

      Agreed totally Dave. This is never any fun. It’s worse in other states, especially when one is descending at 30+ mph and a bloody dog runs out of nowhere. Our mate Dr. Pain crashed hard at 45+ mph a couple of years ago when he t-boned a dog on a road bike. It wasn’t pretty for his ankle or his Ti road bike 🙁 The dog, we don’t know what happened to him / her?

  5. Avatar steve f lagg

    I don’t like riding gravel and dirt roads??
    I’m sorry, is this the “precious” road cycling forum? You know the type, “I got a speck of dust on my white cycling shoes, life as I knew it has changed FOREVER!…..”

    Really, what’s not to like?
    I get back from a gravel ride with a smile, a road ride with “I’m glad that’s over! “

  6. I’m interested in dirt biking, in part because I enjoy mountain biking but am not fit enough to enjoy the part where you ride up the mountain. The most appealing parts to me are reading the terrain, applying grip and momentum, and “getting away from it all”.

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